Written April, 2021

 In January of 2016 I moved to Goma, Democratic Republic of Congo and met a man who was by far the most intriguing and unique man I’ve ever encountered. After a couple months of observing his character and getting to know him I knew he was nothing short of amazing. He was a local musician; a rapper whose interest was not for his own celebrity status, but to promote peace, freedom from oppression, justice and the rights of women in a war torn region known as the rape capital of the world. He was born from rape and had grown up fighting against the stigmas that come with that. He is kind and gentle and yet he is the strongest and toughest man I know. He does the right thing, even when he thinks no one is looking. He defends the rights of the defenseless and he really is the voice for the voiceless.

Apparently he felt I was equally amazing and began to pursue my heart. By the end of August that same year, I knew I also wanted to spend my life with him. We had opposition to our relationship and prayed about how to handle it. We both heard God say, “Not now... wait for my timing”. This was a hard thing to hear and even harder to do, but we chose to do what we both felt like God was saying.

Over the next few years, despite challenges... him being kidnapped, tortured and left for dead in 2018 (the hardest 4 days of my life), me having moved back to the USA, us not speaking regularly, and both of us focusing on our work… we never gave up hope that God would bring us back together. I had opportunities to go back to Goma- but I didn’t have peace, instead the consistent feeling that God was saying “wait…”, so I waited. We waited.

Scripture says “hope deferred makes the heart sick…” this was true. Our story is amazing because God is in it, but it has been incredibly painful at times. My heart ached, his heart ached. I asked God to shut down feeling in my heart until it was time. I stopped talking about this hope I held on to for a life with this incredible man.

This past January, the door to go back to Goma opened wide. Blackman and I partnered together through his local foundation to teach biblical discipleship principles to local leaders. Seeing him for the first time in almost 4 years was surreal. At first I felt almost numb. I had also told him I was coming for work and until God said otherwise, he was to keep all romantic sentiment to himself. The first night I was there, he said he went home feeling incredibly sad that I was no longer in love with him, but he still wanted to marry me. I felt cautious from the years of “hope deferred”. After almost 2 weeks, my heart finally came fully alive. It was time. I was given peace to make my choice. Four years ago, we had matching outfits made in faith that one day we would be married. When he asked me, my choice was still “YES”.

His character wasn’t the same, it was “fuller”. He’s an even greater man than who I left almost 4 years ago. He has endured some of the most unimaginable pain and trauma and he has worked through it to come out the other side with peace and forgiveness. He is wise, kind, funny, generous, ambitious and passionate. He is emotionally mature and a man of incredible faith. He is not afraid to say hard things and he is not afraid to love big.

For about a week, we both felt strongly that God was telling us, “now is the time”. We prayed to understand what that meant; I was asking God for a sign of His timing to know for sure He was in this. Towards the end of my trip, the concept of “eloping” came up. This is not something that is done in Congo- culturally or otherwise. Nor was this ever on my radar. Why would I want to get married without my family? But an impossible door was opened to us… and we said, “yes Lord!”. Our families were shocked to say the least, but on board, even if some where very hesitant at the time.

Seventeen hours was all it took for God to give us our dream- spending THIS SIDE OF ETERNITY together. In seventeen hours from the moment we decided to explore this impossible option, we were married. Today… he is my amazing husband.

God is not just a God of love and goodness and faithfulness to His promises, but of SURPRISE and the unexpected. He doesn’t just open doors that no one can shut ( Rev. 3:7), He is also Maker and Creator of heaven and earth, He creates doors where there are none, for us to walk through. I could never have imagined these last few months of my life if I tried.

As I wrote the date of our marriage in my journal the night of my wedding… 4-3-2-1… “Now is the time” - God don’t play.